Balancing Acts

Baby elephant on a tightrope

Cancer is a huge time sucker.  Really!  I had no idea.  It takes over your life.  One week I was supposed to have one doctor's appointment.  A light week, really.  Just one appointment!  It was a long appointment.  And after it was over, I had a whole slate of new things to fit into my schedule that week which required a bit of juggling, the help of other people, and a whole lot of time.

It happens to all of us, though.  We are making it through our day or week, and then WHAM!  Something happens that throws a wrench in our schedule.  It may be a sick child, a big project at work, a home repair that needs to be addressed, a health crisis, a natural disaster, a family matter...insert your own challenge here.  What makes it doable?  How do you manage when that unexpected thing comes up?

Acrobats balancing.

I have never been a queen of organization, but I am learning that I am not completely disorganized, either.  And guess what?  All of those time management and organizational people may be right...the more organized you are, the more you can juggle these extras into your life.  I hate to admit it, but I think they are on to something. Planning ahead has definitely helped me to cope.

Here are some things that have been helpful to me:
*Planning meals:  I keep the pantry, fridge, and freezer stocked with meals made ahead, or ingredients that make putting dinner on the table quick and easy.  For difficult days following surgery or chemotherapy, I lined up friends and relatives to bring in meals and help with cleaning.  It has really been a lifesaver.  Knowing there is always something on hand for my family to eat has been a tremendous blessing.

*Do your homework:  Reading up on my surgery online helped me glean tips from other women as to how to prepare.  A comfortable post-mastectomy camisole, button-up shirts, and pillows to prop up my arm were just a few amenities I was glad to have when I came home from the hospital.  After attending chemo class, I stocked up on some basics to help with potential side effects, and it was nice to know going into the week without knowing what lovely side effects would hit me or when, that I had coping mechanisms in place.  No late night trips to the store for me (or my nice husband)!

*Ask for help:  This one is surprisingly hard.  However, I am learning to ask people to take some things off my plate, and that relieves the stress, too.   I am also learning that asking for help keeps too much stress from piling up on my family.  So, when your own crisis hits, ask for help until you get your balance back.  Friends, neighbors, and relatives are surprisingly willing to help with children, driving, cleaning, food, cash, and other things you may need when your life throws you a curve ball.

William Arthur Ward is quoted as saying "A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life."  I agree.  Look for reasons to laugh.  For me, though, my spiritual life is an even more important coping mechanism than a sense of humor.  I recommend both.

What are the ways you cope with the unexpected events in your life?  How do you keep your balance and keep your life moving forward in a crisis?

The Magic of One Year - What Will Your Journey Be?

Artwife takes a hike - Grand Wash, Capitol Reef, Utah

I have read many books about people accomplishing a big goal, and have noticed that they often take an entire year to do it.  Is there magic in one year?  Perhaps smaller goals more easily completed don't merit a book contract.  But could there be more to it than that?  I have never been big on New Year's resolutions.  The most successful ones I have kept have been slightly tongue-in-cheek, like the year I resolved to watch more Cary Grant movies.  (Incidentally, I have never been sorry I made or kept that one!)  But maybe this year I should reach for something more.

Dr. Edwin Locke researched goals and motivation.  His work is the foundation for goal-setting theory today.  He found that people perform better on their goals if they are both specific and difficult.  Maybe the time frame of one year allows someone to accomplish something difficult (thus staying motivated), while the time limit of a year is just long enough, but not too long.

January is a great time to reflect on what you would like to accomplish in the upcoming year.  At the end of this year, what would you like to be?  More fit?  More social?  More well-educated?  More gainfully employed?  More financially stable? More creative?  More happy?  In her book, One Year to an Organized Life,  Regina Leeds asserts:  "Given the parameter of one year, anyone can gradually learn the necessary skills and make the time to achieve transformation."  Perhaps there is magic in one year.

Fortunately for readers and moviegoers, many adventuresome souls have documented their one-year journeys, and if you don't want to take your own journey at this time, maybe you'll enjoy sharing in theirs.  Here are some titles I have enjoyed about one-year accomplishments:

One Year Off, by David Cohen, chronicles his journey around the world with his wife and small children.  If you have ever wondered what it would be like to leave your home and job and set off around the world, reading this book is a very safe way to check it out.  The book is very entertaining, and Mr. Cohen details things they learned along the way, and also what they would do differently (take less luggage).  The descriptions of exotic locations and experiences are great for any fan of travel narratives.

Long Distance, by Bill McKibben, follows the author as he spends a year working out as an elite athlete to see how well he can perform in cross country skiing.  It is an interesting story, and the author gains a better understanding of the training an elite athlete does to prepare for international competition. He pushes himself to his physical limits, and also copes with his father's illness.  The author effectively expresses how this emotional journey with his father impacts his perspective on his physical training and racing.  

The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.  I love this book because the author was satisfied with her life overall. She did not make any drastic changes (like selling her home and leaving the country), but instead broke down her ultimate goal of achieving more happiness into manageable, monthly projects.  Reading this book can give you ideas of things you might want to tackle in your own life.  The author candidly, and with humor, relates her successes and failures in her one year experiment.  She also has thoroughly researched happiness for you!  The author encourages you to start your own happiness project, and provides suggestions and a website to help you do just that.

Julie and Julia:  I admit I just watched the movie on this one!  This is the story of Julie Powell and her goal to cook all of Julia Child's 524 recipes from "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" in 365 days.  She does this all from her tiny apartment kitchen. The movie version, starring Amy Adams as Julie Powell and Meryl Streep as Julia Child, is entertaining.  I also loved watching someone else do the cooking!  This is a great example of someone exploring their creative self while remaining in their existing life, and the movie is a lot of fun.

If I were to vote for my top choice for a goal this year, it would definitely be One Year Off!  However, I think  I may end up working more on One Year to an Organized Life.  Meanwhile, I will look to the dreamers and goal-achievers I have mentioned above for encouragement and inspiration.  Happy reading, and Happy New Year!